Thoughts that go through my head while lying facedown on my yoga mat listening to "Warning Sign":
Who do I miss? What do I want to miss. Why is writing so hard I am in the same kind of state this is just like when I loved shooting star by Harper simon I listened tothat a billion times it reminds me of when I went through the same phase when i was a janitor. i was into things like healing katniss and ed sheeran. i need to find something to make me come alive a gain. what can that kind of thing be. is it a person. i doubt that. no one wpud want that burden. i am an island.
i am doing much better. i am tlking to people, right?! but i just am finding out what kind of state i am in. it looks like a bunch of others, but i think this one is unique. or rather not unique just different than what i am used to. this hurts my head
the fireworks are going off and i wait for a scream of someone who wasn't ready. the scream of someone who didn't want to go. but they didn't handle fire very well. i feel like i am the same wayl. although sometimes i feel like i am fire. freedom it cries freedom. give me air GIVE ME AIR but i can't let it out because i don't have my gloves on yet and then i just loose some of the spark and then i feel dull and lifeless like my fire has been burned out and i have to flash lights in an empty fireplace to keep people warm. but no one depended on the life of my fire right? I did I need that warmth within me. otherwise the shadows play darkly against the walls of my soul.
what left? i can't figure out how it was extinguished. did i not feed it. was i too cruel. did it need love? i can't find it out. so i write. and i write and i write because for me writing is like breating sometimes. i can't go out ad run and go five miles, as much as i want to. but instead i am trapped here in a body that i don't feel is mine. i cannot hold it properly because it beongs to someone else. thta is a perfect description of the feeling. i know i have had dreams like this.
i need to breathe. i need to let out all that tar and dust and crap until i can breathe again. this whole place is too constrictiong, i think i will scream. istead of screaming i write. and i warite and my computer feels the pressure of my tension because this is where the strong men feel pain.
i want to be enveloped in nothing ness. in the dark blue and grey and black of your deepest thoughts. i want to be numbed and find that because i am living in a limbo right now. a sad limbo. it is a grotesque place. i can't feel anthing very keenly. it is like i have been taken to a file. no longer sharp. just a blunt place. can you tell me something worth writing for?
i just wantto sleep and dream. is this depression?
ownvielkajdk o esndkg alskdi enisngh lsightsnnd sightnslda as aawevns dksdngi jakn n k kkk jjghg aa;sdlk irnbi ppp idn inkns wet asdf wdf ;klasjfdsldkfj;skj
Who do I miss? What do I want to miss. Why is writing so hard I am in the same kind of state this is just like when I loved shooting star by Harper simon I listened tothat a billion times it reminds me of when I went through the same phase when i was a janitor. i was into things like healing katniss and ed sheeran. i need to find something to make me come alive a gain. what can that kind of thing be. is it a person. i doubt that. no one wpud want that burden. i am an island.
i am doing much better. i am tlking to people, right?! but i just am finding out what kind of state i am in. it looks like a bunch of others, but i think this one is unique. or rather not unique just different than what i am used to. this hurts my head
the fireworks are going off and i wait for a scream of someone who wasn't ready. the scream of someone who didn't want to go. but they didn't handle fire very well. i feel like i am the same wayl. although sometimes i feel like i am fire. freedom it cries freedom. give me air GIVE ME AIR but i can't let it out because i don't have my gloves on yet and then i just loose some of the spark and then i feel dull and lifeless like my fire has been burned out and i have to flash lights in an empty fireplace to keep people warm. but no one depended on the life of my fire right? I did I need that warmth within me. otherwise the shadows play darkly against the walls of my soul.
what left? i can't figure out how it was extinguished. did i not feed it. was i too cruel. did it need love? i can't find it out. so i write. and i write and i write because for me writing is like breating sometimes. i can't go out ad run and go five miles, as much as i want to. but instead i am trapped here in a body that i don't feel is mine. i cannot hold it properly because it beongs to someone else. thta is a perfect description of the feeling. i know i have had dreams like this.
i need to breathe. i need to let out all that tar and dust and crap until i can breathe again. this whole place is too constrictiong, i think i will scream. istead of screaming i write. and i warite and my computer feels the pressure of my tension because this is where the strong men feel pain.
i want to be enveloped in nothing ness. in the dark blue and grey and black of your deepest thoughts. i want to be numbed and find that because i am living in a limbo right now. a sad limbo. it is a grotesque place. i can't feel anthing very keenly. it is like i have been taken to a file. no longer sharp. just a blunt place. can you tell me something worth writing for?
i just wantto sleep and dream. is this depression?
ownvielkajdk o esndkg alskdi enisngh lsightsnnd sightnslda as aawevns dksdngi jakn n k kkk jjghg aa;sdlk irnbi ppp idn inkns wet asdf wdf ;klasjfdsldkfj;skj
